Make your own set of Bubbly Liquids

Becoming a Pharmacist is no easy matter. There are many things you have to know about substances, and many others you will have to have tasted before you can become a true mad scientist.

But we at Strange BUT Untrue want to help all aspiring insane geniuses out there by telling you how to obtain one of the main things every good Pharmacist needs - a set of Bubbly Liquids. These can be stored in glass test tubes beneath complicated set-ups of tubing, and the aspiring Pharmacist needs to move between one container and the next sniffing and tasting them. Some appreciative nodding and of course mad laughter is essential at this point. They also serve as a handy beverage if you get thirsty in the middle of that vital experiment and are too busy to leave the lab.

You will need:

• Several large bottles of Lemonade

• As many different bottles of food colouring as you can scrounge

• Test tubes and other weird glass apparatus ("borrow" these from someone else's lab - it costs less)

Step One:

Three-quarter fill a test tube with lemonade.

Step Two:

Add food colouring of several different colours (the more disgusting it looks, the better suited it is for Pharmacy.)

Step Three:

Insert bung into test tube and shake for several hours.

Step Four:

Find someone gullible; ask them to take out the bung. Leave room and preferably country.

Step Five:

Find a new laboratory and repeat steps one to four using other colours, until you either have a full set or run out of labs.

Now all you need to do is set up as much apparatus as you can in your cellar around the Bubbly Liquids, and use it to terrify friends and family.

Congratulations! You have made the first step towards becoming a truly crazy Pharmacist! Just work on your mad laughter and learn some of the Strange BUT Untrue Pharmacy in the other articles, and you can pick up your GCI (General Certificate of Insanity) from your nearest mental institution (as well as a complementary straight-jacket).

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