"Squidgy Things" is the generic name for plants and animals. They are called this because unlike metals and wood and stuff; when you apply enough pressure to them they have a tendency to go "Squidge". More often than not they also spill messy bits all over the floor which take no end of scrubbing to remove. These simple tests will determine if something is truly a Squidgy Thing.
For many years the Ancients pondered what all these messy bits were, and only in the modern world are we beginning to appreciate just how pointless a lot of them actually are. This is why man keeps trying to make computers that are intelligent, so the machines can take over and make the world a much more efficient place. (And also concrete it over, a process that man has already begun in anticipation.)
So, if you haven't fallen asleep yet, it's time to explore the terribly designed world of Squidgy Things. Just click a link:
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